Jim is a relatively private guy. Sure, we met because he was moderating a panel at a public discussion, and our early relationship developed in part on Twitter, but he pretty much keeps to himself. He’s on the social media channels but is very discerning about what he puts out there. You could say his public commentary is well-curated.
In contrast, I’m fairly open and guard my privacy with a sheer curtain. As a result he’s become more public. It’s more common now for me to attend events with him than without him. Like it or not, people who know me know him, and to know Jim is to like him.
I’m serious. Every time we go out together, someone will say to me (usually in front of him) “I LOVE Jim! He’s awesome! You two are so great!”
He explains it by saying that he has three older sisters, and then I say how much I owe them, and then we all laugh.
While it certainly didn’t hurt that he was inundated from an early age with the idiosyncrasies and vagaries of femininity, that alone doesn’t do him justice.
I have never met anyone so giving. If a friend needs him, he’s there. Period. Any time my son has wanted anything there’s been no question. It would be easy to say “of course! If he didn’t feel that way then you shouldn’t be with him.” And I would agree. And I would point out that that’s why I was single for years before I met him.
This past week has been one of the most traumatic of my life. I’ve been physically debilitated and that is mentally crippling. But it would have been so, so much worse if Jim weren’t there to take care of me. He helped me stand and sit; he fed me; he made sure I took my medication. He slept five feet away from me on the chaise lounge because I couldn’t sleep in our bed. He helped me do everything that I couldn’t do for myself, with no questions or complaints. For him, it was just “of course”.
I am fiercely, strongly independent. You tell me I can’t do something and I will do it just to spite you. But this past week I just couldn’t do and I had to put myself in someone else’s hands. I had to put myself in Jim’s hands.
So, Dear Jim, Thank You. I couldn’t have gotten through this without you.